No, I'm Not Okay

No, I'm not okay. Grow up, get over it, there are many people much worse off than you are and they are completely happy with their lives, so what's your problem? Just trust God. Focus on Him. What does that mean? Well, it means... focusing on God.

That is what I need to do, but it is taking me awhile to figure out what that means. I have realized that if I am pursuing the Lord, everything else is secondary. My fulfillment comes from my relationship with him. The hard part is actually doing that, it's actually not listening to lies I tell myself and the concerns the world says I should have.

Last night I relaxed and read all night. It was great. A few nights ago one of my best friends sat down and ate dinner with me. We didn't talk much. We just sat there, eating our cheeseburgers, watching the Simpsons, laughing every few minutes. He didn't ask me what was wrong, or what he could do, or tell me what I should do. He knows where I am right now and how low I feel, and all he could do was just be there. And it was good. I saw God's care for me in his friendship. He couldn't do anything to improve my mood and he knew that, so we just sat and watched Bart Simpson help Principal Skinner get his job back. It was a good time.